Introduction

Where do I start?

Margaret, my wife of over fifty one years, returned home from hospital two weeks ago. She had had several falls over a short period culminating with a trip to our local hospital's emergency department where I wished her a happy birthday at 12.00 midnight on the 26 September.

In hospital, scans and tests showed that she had had two significant strokes in the last couple of weeks which would have affected her balance. She had two compression fractures of the spine as a result of the fall and more importantly she was suffering acute renal failure probably triggered by a urinary tract infection.

It took almost seven days to get her kidneys functioning properly. After seven days she would have needed dialysis which, due her poor health, she was not a good candidate for.

She was then transferred to a rehabilitation hospital where she was taught how to use walking aids such as a stick and, what we call, a wheely walker. After ten days I was asked what I wanted for Margaret.

Thed hospital's preferred option was to place Margaret in a nursing home as a medium high care patient as the list of her ailments included:

1. Chron's disease now in remission but the root cause of all subsequent problems as the main treatment over the last 40 years has been steroids to reduce the bowel inflammation. These have now destroyed her immune system, stopped her adrenal glands from producing cortisone and resulted in spontaneous bruising and bleeding.
2. Cardiovascular problems causing numerous mini strokes and the two significant ones mentioned above.
3. Renal Artery Stenosis which with the cardiovascular problems has caused pulmonary oedema and congestive heart failure on several occasions.
4. Osteoarthritis of the knees and spine aggravated by osteoporosis and made worse by the continuing treatment by steroids.
5. Finally vascular dementia requiring almost full time supervision as Margaret has little short term memory and forgets times, dates and what medication to take.
   
   

My response was that if Margaret could live safely at home she should come home and I would continue to be her carer. Earlier this year, following another stay in hospital, Margaret spent several weeks in a retirement home to give me respite and rest while I had surgery. She was very unhappy in spite of the homes being excellent places with dedicated carers so I want her to live at home as long as possible. As this, to some extent, depends on my personal health and well being I have decided to blog about my day to day experiences and emotions as Margaret's carer.

Margaret in 1957